Managing Disappointment

I don't like feeling the emotion of disappointment.   It sucks.

I had to do a self coaching model (ok five self coaching models if you have to know the truth) on my feeling of disappointment over the last few weeks.  I have really been diving into this feeling and getting to know what it is all about and here is what I have come up with:

Disappointment feels heavy, devoid of air, limp.  My body slumps when I feel it.  I experience lethargy and a mild ache in my body when I am feeling it.

Every thought I questioned that was causing disappointment came from a previous expectation I had created about someone or something.  For example, I wanted someone to behave in a certain way and they didn't. I wanted something to play out differently and it didn't.  This is me when I try to control my circumstances.  Instead of managing my thoughts, I get impossible ideas about controlling the circumstances of my future.

 I don't do this by thinking thoughts that are empowering and exciting;  I do this by setting myself up as a dependent.   I create a story in my mind about how I can only feel good if the future plays out the way I want it to in specific detail.  I don't trust the universe to bring me exactly what I need and accept it when it comes by thinking in  a way that feels good. I push against it and think it shouldn't be happening and then I feel, well, disappointed.

And after spending hours and  sometimes days feeling disappointed that it didn't go according to my plan, I see the beauty in the Universal Plan.  I see that it went just the way it needed to for my higher good. I see that it is even better than what I could have imagined.

The opposite of disappointment, for me, is gratitude.  I am learning (albeit slowly) that I can choose to be thankful for every circumstance I can't control.  Gratitude feels light and wonderful!  Gratitude kicks disappointment's ass each and every time.  Gratitude is a choice.

The thought that I plug into the self coaching model for gratitude is this:

Thought:  I know I can access the intelligence within me to show me how this is the perfect circumstance for me right now.

Feeling:  Gratitude

Action:  Do the self work required and move onto the next thing

Result: Peaceful coexistence with my circumstances and amazing access to ideas

Try this next time you feel disappointed and you won't be.