My Lifetime of Deliberate Practice

I often get emails asking me how I know what I know and do what I do.  I usually reply the same answer to everyone, so I thought I would share it with anyone else who wonders about me as a coach.

I have spent my life reading self help books.  My first memory of
getting hooked was when I was 15 years old and breaking up with my
boyfriend.  I was in excruciating emotional pain because of unprocessed
pain from my childhood.  I went to the bookstore and bought Robin
Norwood's book, "Women Who Love Too Much."  I started reading it in the
tub that evening and didn't stop until the book was done and the water
was cold.  That book gave me tremendous relief.  I immediately felt a
deep love for Robin, who clearly understood my pain.  I was not alone.

that day, I have made it a life-long habit to go to the bookstore when
I feel any type of emotional pain.  This habit of "reading for relief"
eventually turned into the habit of "reading for any dang reason at
all." I mostly read non-fiction, self help, and psychology.  I have
also been known to read a business book on the side.  Authors have
become my mentors, friends, confidants and saviors.

Now, you must
know, when I read a book I really read it.  I read it, underline it, think about it,
question it, apply it, and live it for a while.  I suspend my judgment
on most ideas until I have tried them out for myself.  I do the
worksheets, practice the practices, and consider the concepts on a deep
level.  Many times I end up integrating the practices into my life and
other times I toss out ideas that don't resonate with the way I live my

It always amuses me when someone, who has read my book, writes me and tells me it isn't working- as if my book could do the work for them.  When I reply and ask if they are keeping the journals or writing down the thoughts, I am never surprised when they send back their list of excuses.

Knowledge not applied can't change your life.

But, take it from me, if you apply the knowledge that resonates with you from each book you read;  you will have the life of your dreams before you know it.  Let others who have gone before you show you the way.

That's how I do it and have done it since I was 15 years old.

Thank you, Robin.