My son didn't do so well on that test he studied so hard for.
He gulped back tears as he told me.
I didn't react.
I asked why.
He said he didn't know.
And then, in the car, later, I told him this:
Everything that you do in your life that seems like failure gives you a choice.
You can either use it to love yourself more or less.
There is no other option.
So, my beloved son who hung the moon, what will your choice be today?
That's so hard mom.
I know buddy.
But can you imagine if you started loving yourself each time you make a mistake or miss a goal or do poorly on a test or say something you didn't mean? Can you imagine how you would feel about yourself and how much kinder a person you would be if you always chose love?
Yes, mom. It feels waaaaay better.
In ten years you won't remember the grade you got on that test, but you will remember and you will feel the love you chose.
Maybe that's the real test.