Why I do what I do…

I just finished Portia De Rossi's book, Unbearable Lightness.

It took me through her hell and back to my own.

Anyone who has loathed themselves deeply for any length of time knows this hell.

We are a specific group of people who recognize each other in our disordered behavior.

We have done things that are unspeakable.

We have felt so alone that not even we were with ourselves.

We have lied and shamed and hidden.

I remember a moment, in my own painful past, when I promised myself that I would help others if I ever found my way out.

I did and I am.

When I have a client who is suffering at the effect of her own mind, I am filled with compassion and recognition.

I am confident there is a way out.

I am desperate to show them that it is up to them to find the truth about who they really are.

Portia (and I) believed that if we could just be thinner, everything would be right with the world.

Thinness was the answer that was going to solve everything.

More specifically, as it is for most of us who have loathed ourselves, if I could just be something other than what I am, I would be loved.

(Of course, the exact opposite is true.)

I do what I do because I've been where my clients are.

It is hell on earth.

And if I can help-I must.